Don’t roll your eyes at me yet, thinking you’re the man. You might be killing your chances with the ladies and I’m just here to help.
So here are your tell-tale signs:
- Your house smells like bad decisions, damp gym clothes …and a rat– It’s good to clean your room often so as to leave it smelling fresh… but just in case you are having a guest pop in unannounced, you should have a set of scented candles up to your rescue. I know what you’re thinking… that candles are girly… NO! It doesn’t have to be a flowery jasmine here vanilla there option. Let me explain this… did you know that there are candles particularly dedicated to testosterone? That smell like wood, cedar, leather, beer and cut grass???Well the last two options are a bit weird I know but people have weird preferences… so save a human being from the agony of a sad smelling house by stocking these masculine candles!
- You have no idea when you last changed your sheets– Dude, seriously? This is how you miss the chance to gain instant street cred with the ladies. Regardless if your eyes are open or closed, your nose is forever open to bad odor and fresh scents coming from your pillow, sheets and duvet (if you have one). In a room that you’re probably going to spend 8+ hours in after a hard day’s work, I suggest changing the sheets and covers to clean ones every once a week…okay, two weeks. Just be clean.
- You’ve stuck posters up your wall– You’re not in your campus dorm anymore sticking Rambo and Scar face posters up your wall. Let me make this clear, yes you can have posters, the right, meaningful, wall of fame, limited edition ones… say of a match you helped your school win or something, but FRAME them. FRAME is the key word here. You’re a man. Real men use frames.
- You have no matching dishes or matching china– You still have the mugs you stole from your campus roomie? That have chapped edges and crack lines all over them? That are each a different shade lighter than the last? Hinting that they used to be coloured? Then you’re living like a boy. Simply owning cookware and at least more than 4 pairs of matching plates, cups and cutlery shows that you are a grown up man who can be able to whip a quick meal for himself and his companions when hunger strikes. Plus impressing a lady with a hint of cooking ability might have things moving in the right direction.
- Your bathroom is a housefly haven– And by bathroom I mean the House of Lords…the gong…okay, the toilet? Guys, don’t we all like going to the bathroom without feeling like disinfecting ourselves afterwards? Bacteria in the toilet absorb organic waste and release gases which smell…bad. Always flush the toilet, have air freshener and purchase antibacterial cleaning agents from your nearby store. Good hygiene always looks good on you so be sure to keep up with it.
- Your shoes don’t have a home– I don’t think anyone of sound mind fancies going around in your house kicking shoes because they are in their way, it’s pretty depressing if you ask me. It shows how disorganized and careless you are. A shoe rack is not an item that will lead to a life of abject poverty if you dared purchase one. Shoes are also useful as weapons for self-defense, they are lightweight and can hit the target spot on before you find something else that’s more concrete to use when burglars break in. So treat them nicely. Get yourself a shoe rack.
- You don’t own a bookshelf…with books in it– Even if you don’t read…pretend you do. Personally, I’m more of a collector and less of a reader, not ashamed to say that at all. I just love how books look like you know? That’s all. Buy a bookshelf or two …or even custom fix one of your own, I mean, you’re a man…and men are born fixers. After you buy or fix, stack them with the most extraordinary reads you can possibly compile…the ones I’m too scared to ask you questions about because I am intimidated by the subject. Having books in your house makes you look sophisticated, like you know things…even if you don’t.
So guys, those were my 7 random signs that you live like a boy. I hope they gave you a hint of what needs to go and what needs to stay in your bachelor pad.
You know questions, comments and shares are always much appreciated here : )… see you in a few days!
*peace and laughter*